Posted in Uncategorized on December 8th, 2009 by Man
It hasn’t gotten any easier. Smiling at this woman who deserves better who truly loves me…yet I feel almost nothing in return.
The honorable thing…the proper thing….would be too leave. But I can’t. I’m stuck. Due to life choices I have very little money of my own. I have about two months of money saved away. I will need more. Right now the plan is to increase the amount I am saving and hopefully within a year I can leave.
Each time she kisses me her lips feel so cold and wet….like a the way a metal swing set feels on a damp winter morning.
Don’t get me wrong. I want to love her. I try. But then I think….should I have to? Should love just come?
Next year will mark 10 years together. Almost 1/3 of my life. All seems like a waste now. One day I will wake up and we will be no more. What’s the point of it all?
This is my life….in the corner.